The Modern Man’s Creed

This is written by a guy named Steve Turner:

We believe in Marx, Freud and Darwin. We believe everything is ok as long as you don’t hurt anyone to the best of your definition of “hurt” and to the best of your definition of “knowledge.”

We believe in sex before, during and after marriage. We believe in the therapy of sin. We believe that adultery is fun. We believe that sodomy is ok. We believe that taboos are taboo.

We believe everything is getting better despite evidence to the contrary, the evidence must be investigated and you can prove anything with evidence.

We believe there is something in horoscopes, UFOs and bent spoons. Jesus was a good man just like Buddha, Mohammed and ourselves. He was a good moral teacher although basically we think his good morals were really bad.

We believe that all religions are basically the same, at least the ones that we read were, they all believe in love and goodness. They only differ on matters of creation, heaven, hell, God and salvation. We believe that after death comes nothing because when you ask the dead what happens, they say nothing. If death is not the end and the dead have lied, then it’s compulsory heaven for all except perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Khan.

We believe in Masters and Johnson: what’s selected is average, what’s average is normal and what’s normal is good.

We believe in total disarmament. We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed. Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russians would be sure to follow.

We believe that man is essentially good, it’s only his behavior that lets him down. This is the fault of society, society is the fault of conditions and conditions are the fault of society. We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him and reality will adapt accordingly, the universe will readjust, history will alter. We believe there is no absolute truth except the truth that there is no absolute truth.

We believe in the rejection of creeds and the flowering of individual thought.

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