Defining high school? The definition to high school is definition.
I consider myself kind of a pro in this field seeing as though I am a current 4th year student at Stow high. Up until last year, I was on the pursuit to find who Elli Morscher really is.
These kids get so caught up in throwing around different personas of themselves, its ridiculous. But, I don’t need to tell you that, it’s obvious. I believe I have gone through 10 different shades of Elli in one week. My mind changes every hour about who I am thus I change. I am who I want to be. And our motivation? To be who everyone else wants us to be. PERIOD. We all seek to stick out attractively to other people, no matter what we see. High school is people pleasing.
So for me, that got old real fast. Not speed of light fast like, 2.5 years fast… So it took me awhile to catch on all this effort put into being an “amazing person” is not worth it.
I realized being a “person” isn’t even worth bragging about.
I see the high school as a mud pit. A mud pit with a bunch of worms crawling on top of each other to be the highest (take that every way it can come off as.)
That is who people are no matter how much we paint ourselves, bulk up or drink. WE can’t change the inside.
So I got a little depressed about that…
But, today I felt as if I was shining bright, beautiful light out of every pore of my body. How’s that?
No matter how fucked my week is, I still feel different at my high school. Every day, it’s in my insides. I walk the halls, listen to debates, watch people and I feel different. I have a motivation to live, I have meaning. I am defined.
It’s like I am published. I’m not better than anyone or smarter, I am just stamped and sealed permanently while most of the other kids are walking around blank and failing at finding how to get published.
And sometimes I can see people catch on, look at me differently. I get a lot of different looks but every one of them, I don’t have to add to my definition because I’m already set.
And when I do share why I am so different… well… they think “how weird.”
They think it’s weird and why wouldn’t they?
They either hear about a loving savior who gave his life for someone else’s… or they approach a packed house full of kids glowing, defined, just like me.
They take a step back, flabbergasted, and think this must be a cult!
Because when they walk in, they see some crazy different kids sitting down to listen to someone with a Bible in front of them. They see people congratulate the teacher and sit in conversation about what was just taught. They get asked about their life to the extent where they had to think and really had to think. The undefined person would chat with a smiling friend as so many other smiling, glowing kids came up to them, one by one to introduce themselves personally. They would see how many different people there were in the same room: a middle age woman talking to a freshman in high school both sincere. And they would step back and see all these things making one big fire. Radiating warmth. Nothing they have ever seemed before. May be overwhelming, especially the first time, because this weird concept just became larger than life.
And why wouldn’t it be weird? I mean it is weird. High schoolers–kids–coming together to study the Bible? From jocks to english nerds? Talking, socializing… relating? Boys and girls? Different years in hs?
And they were there to listen to a Bible teaching and pray…
This person would be experiencing the flame of Jesus Christ ignited and held high. They would be experiencing, maybe for the first time, people learning to sacrificially love one another. And they would be experiencing these defined folk supported by someone who loves them unconditionally….
But, so bright…